Shed a Little Light
very knee-dy the past few years. So, under the knife I went, emerging bionic and a bit broken.
I was naïve when it came to the recovery process. Most former athletes carry a hubris that is counterproductive to reality of major trauma to a major joint. The past four months have humbled, crumbled and stumbled my body and my psyche.
The good news is that the knee is on the mend. It still feels like a foreign object—which it is. But at least now I am finally resting soundly and able to maneuver about, though it is intentional and slower.
Besides time, the best healer has been a return to normalcy. For me, that is the independence of driving and spending time with my grandchildren. Because of the April surgery date, my grandchildren were busy with STAAR testing, dance practices, church activities, and homework. Facetime was a lifeline, but there is nothing quite like a hug from a little one.
When they did come to visit, Lillie and Ellie saw me cry, lessons in the moments that sometimes our tears stem from an emotion we cannot explain, not always from physical pain. Vulnerability and sleep deprivation make for a cocktail of tears.
My sister and brother-inlaw in Lubbock were excellent caregivers, providing me with their biggest room in the house with ensuite bathroom. They worked during the day, so the lonely days in the early weeks were tough. I confess to using food delivery services sometimes just to have brief human interaction.
The bright spots appeared, though. The physical therapists diligently went about their work with those of us who were older. Since so much healing has to do with mental well-being, these professionals were encouragers as well as enforcers with positive bedside manners.
Much gratitude for my surgeon from Mexico, his nurse practitioner from Ghana, and their med student fromRwandawhosaw me at my blubbering stage in the early post-op visits. Their tenderness merited a thank you when the Grace Clinic asked for feedback after one particular office visit. Five stars for their kind souls. I felt as if they talked and listened to me as they would do with their own grandmothers.
For those of you who breezed through knee replacement surgery, hats off. I am hoping that my left knee will cooperate a little better when the time comes to go through this procedure one more time.
For now, I simply “kneed” to jump back (albeit gingerly) into living life.
Snyder, Texas, native Sue Jane Sullivan is a retired schoolteacher whose thought-provoking commentary appears occasionally in several West Texas newspapers, including The Texas Spur and The Caprock Courier.
